A party two doors down was breaking up at 4:00am Saturday morning, and we stood on the front porch watching tired, drunk revelers stumble past us on their way out, thankful it had finally ended. One of the party guests paused to piss against our coconut tree and Arthur yelled ‘My yard is not a bathroom; getthefuckouttahere… NOW!’
Later he said that he understood the need, but the act just struck him the wrong way.
Well, Wal-Mart is metaphorically pissing on my tree. They just need to stop selling guns. Really. Because once you capitulate to demands from anti-gun groups like Mayors Against Illegal Guns it’s all over. Stop offending me and get out of my yard.
Wal-Mart, which is the largest seller of firearms in the United States, agreed a 10-point code, which also includes rigid inventory controls, with a bipartisan coalition of Mayors Against Illegal Guns led by New York’s Michael Bloomberg.
The retailer said it will develop a first-of-its-kind computerized crime gun trace log that will flag purchases by customers who have previously bought guns later recovered in crimes.
MAIG co-chair Michael Bloomberg:
“The Responsible Firearms Retailer Partnership makes good sense - it will have no impact on a well-intentioned and law-abiding gun buyer - but will help keep Americans safer.”
This reads like one of those “It’s for the children” speeches. It’s for OUR OWN GOOD.
The 10 points of the Responsible Firearms Retailer Partnership are:
1. Videotaping the Point of Sale for All Firearms Transactions. Participating retailers will videotape the point-of-sale of all firearms transactions and maintain videos for 6 months to deter illegal purchases and monitor employees.
2. Computerized Crime Gun Trace Log and Alert System. Mayors Against Illegal Guns will develop a computerized system that participating retailers will implement over time to log crime gun traces relating to the retailer. Once the program is in place, if a customer who has a prior trace at that retailer attempts to purchase a firearm, the sale will be electronically flagged. The retailer would have discretion to proceed with the sale or stop the sale.
3. Purchaser Declaration. For sales flagged by the trace alert system, participating retailers will ask purchasers to fill out a declaration indicating that they meet the legal requirement to purchase the firearm.
4. Deterring Fake IDs. Participating retailers will only accept valid federal- or state-issued picture IDs as primary identification. Retailers will utilize additional ID checking mechanisms.
5. Consistent Visible Signage Consistent Visible Signage. Participating retailers will post signage created by the Responsible Firearms Retailer Partnership to alert customers of their legal responsibilities at the point-of-sale.
6. Employee Background Checks. Participating retailers will conduct criminal background checks for all employees selling or handling firearms.
7. Employee Responsibility Training. Participating retailers will participate in an employee responsibility training program focused on deterring illegal purchasers. The Responsible Firearms Retailer Partnership will create an online training system based on Wal-Mart’s training program.
8. Inventory Checking. Participating retailers will conduct daily and quarterly audits. Guidelines will be based on Wal-Mart’s existing audit procedures.
9. No Sales Without Background Check Results. Participating retailers would prohibit sales based on “default proceeds,” which are permitted by law when the background check has not returned a result within 3 days.
10. Securing Firearms. Participating retailers will maintain firearms kept in customer accessible areas in locked cases or locked to racks.
There are holes so large a bus could drive through them, but as long as it makes them feel good and us feel like criminals for wanting to buy a gun, all objectives have been achieved.
Or am I completely missing the point?
We’ll never, as the female, fully understand the male. But as soon as I see a female squat out here, I’m gonna be all over it! 
That didn’t sound quite right did it? 
I realize this is not quite germain to the intent of the story, but the beginning struk me a funny and reminded me of this.
Last week we had construction guys in front of our house (again) but this time instead of making a mess, they were replacing sod that they’d oh-so-caringly torn out as part of a construction project on our street.
DH was home on Spring Break and took some time to stop and watch what they were doing (the Boo wanted nothing more than to chase them off her property, but I digress), when he see’s one of the guys stand inbetween some tall bushes on our property edge.
He knew what was going on. When the second guy went in to use the tree as a toilet, he yelled, at the top of his loud deep lungs, “YOU! Quit pissing in my yard!” The little mexicano turned three shade of beet red and ran down the street and around the corner as fast as his little immigrant feet would move him. It was hysterical!
DH also made a point of saying it when the Supervisor was there, checking on things! Lord how I do love that man!